The Enemies of Another Reigny Day
I’m not sure what the Cow King has been up to, but man, this guy has got enemies. It seems everyone and their mum are dead set on crashing through his front door and ruining his garden. It’s a gathering storm of baddies, ready to rain on the bovine ruler’s picnic. It’s been said that you should know thine enemy, so let’s get down to some studying. Here are some of the enemies you’ll be up against in Another Reigny Day.
Take the skeletons for example. You’d think that with them being dead, they’d have better things to do, but here they are trying to blow down your front door. Luckily, they’re not all that tough and some well-placed fireballs are all it takes to fry their bones.
Not every attack will come at you from the ground, however. Flying monkeys have a taste for beef and will come at you in flocks (gaggles? What kind of grouping do monkeys fly in?). While their wings separate them from their terrestrial cousins, there’s one thing that they do have in common; a penchant for throwing poop.
Keep your guard up, or you’ll find yourself under a hailstorm of flying feces. You can knock it away with a swat of your hand, but if they get the best of you, you may find yourself with an expensive and humiliating visit to the dry cleaners.
If skeletons and winged monkeys don’t impress you, watch out for the armored knights. They may prefer shovels to axes, but they’re no less deadly. If these guys manage to climb atop your wall, you’d better be ready to throw down. They may be shy about wielding bladed weapons, but that doesn’t mean you should be. If they get in your face, grab your hand axes and give them a swat.
As if there weren’t enough people on your lawn trying to kill you, there’s also gnomes that, in a perfect world, would stay put. Unfortunately, the gnome necromancers (nec-gnome-ancers?) are here to crash the party and aren’t shy about summoning friends to help bring the Cow King’s castle crashing down. Make sure you keep an eye on these pint-sized mages, or you’ll be up to your eyeballs in these miniature maniacs.
Gnomes may seem like a small problem, but your enemies come in all sizes. They make them big wherever these giants come from. They don’t even need to get close to knock on your door, as they are perfectly content with ripping boulders from the earth beneath them to hurl in your direction. Better keep your head down when these lumbering baddies are in the area.
Those aren’t all you’ll be up against, however. You’ll also want to watch out for giant battering rams, bomb-strapped goblins, and terrifying dragons that light up the night sky. I’m not sure what the Cow King did to get on the bad side of these villains (they’re probably jealous of his sweet castle), but it’s your problem to deal with them. Just make sure you’re ready, or the Cow King will be in the market for a new house.